it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes
she got a peep hole in a glass door.
you asked what's for dinner, she put her feet on the table and said corn!
she went to the drug store and asked for marijuana
she told everyone that she was "illegitiment" because she couldn't read
she thought an aspiration was butt sweat.
that she puts lipstick on her head just to make-up her mind
she looks at a can of juice for days 'cause it says concentrate
she thinks Taco Bell is a Mexican phone company
she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl
you have to dig for her IQ!
she got locked in a grocery store and starved!
that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order!
she tripped over a cordless phone and got ran over by a parked car!
she bought a solar-powered flashlight!
she thinks a quarterback is a refund!
she took a cup to see Juice.
she sold the car for gas money.
she ran into an automatic sliding door.
she tried to drown a fish.
she asked you "What is the number for 911"
she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put "O.K."
she got stabbed in a shoot out.
she stole free bread.
she took a spoon to the superbowl.
she called Dan Quayle for a spell check.
she stepped on a crack and broke her own back.
she makes Beavis and Butt-Head look like Nobel Prize winners.
she thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train.
she thought an elevator was a mobile home.
she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif.
when you stand next to her you hear the ocean!
she thinks Fleetwood Mac is a new hamburger at McDonalds!
she sits on the TV, and watches the couch!
she thought Boyz II Men was a day care center.
she bought a videocamera to record cable tv shows at home.
when she went to take the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead.
she jumped out the window and went up.
she thought a quarterback was an income tax refund.
she took a umbrella to see Purple Rain.
that under "Education" on her job application, she put "Hooked on Phonics."
she put out the cigarette butt that was heating your house.
she watches "The Three Stooges" and takes notes.
was born on Independence Day and can't remember her birthday.
she thought gangrene was another golf course
she couldn't read an audio book.
it take her a month to get rid of the 7 day itch.
she thought the Nazis were saying "Hi! Hitler"
it take her a week to get rid of a 24hr virus
it take her a day to cook a 3 minute egg.
She has to ask for help to use hamburger helper
She went to disneyworld and saw a sign that said "Disneyworld Left" so she went home.
she asked me what kind of jeans I had on and I said "guess" so she said levi's
that she sold potato chips on the corner and said free lays.
she thought Forrest Gump was a national park.
when she walked into Walgreens her dumb ass said, "These walls ain't green!!"
she tried to commit suicide by jumping in front of a parked car.
she thought Manual Labor was the president of Mexico.
she put a quarter in a parking meter and she yelled "were's my gumball."
that when she looked in the mirror, she said stop copying me!
she thought Johnny Cash was a pay toilet.
she got fired from the M&M factory for throwing out all the W's.
she brought toilet paper to a crap game.
she asked for a price check at the $.99 store
she waited four hours for a 24 hour store to open.
she walked into an antique store and said what's new!
she locked herself in the bathroom and peed her pants
